p1996's posterous

A different post on Colin Fry

COLIN FRY

Colin Fry is a man who believes and has made other people to think that he has a sixth sence. This sence is that he can communicate with the dead.

                              Everyone is led to believe different things in life, this sort of thing a lot of people suddenly get intrested in, some people will just draw there line and walk away. This can also be seen as in my opinion DRUGS because firstly its addictive once you know something you tend to want to know more, also its either something you want to get involved in or you dont !

                              Colin Fry in my opinion is a waste of time because i'am genreally a very religious person, so i dont believe in this rubbish that someone has powers and talks to the dead because in my opinion god has every control of every power.

           

 

                               I have seen many people who do follow him. It has become so popular to an extent, that they have made books about him, all selling in the book stores. Also he has a website, which involves booking tickets to see his shows. The shocking thing is that it, has done very well. 

 

                        Colin Fry is a normal looking person as shown below even if he does say that he has a "sixth sence." 

 

 

                             

 

                              

 

 

....back 2 the funny jokes.....

An elderly woman went to her local doctor’s office and asked to speak with her doctor. When the receptionist asked why she was there, she replied, “I’d like to have some birth control pills.”

Taken back, the doctor thought for a minute and then said, “Excuse me, Mrs. Glenwood, but you’re 80 years old. What would you possibly need birth control pills for?”

The woman replied, “They help me sleep better.”

The doctor considered this for a second, and continued… “How in the world do birth control pills help you sleep?”

The woman said, “I put them in my granddaughter’s orange juice, and I sleep better at night.”

A Different Post on my school libary

As part of me doing the lovely jokes on my posterous,i have also descided to do a few posts about a few other things. This one i've done is about my school libary.

I go to school in St.Benedicts, our school libary is quite a big size, compared to my old school.

our school libary has: a wide range of books,has about 11 computers in the libary itself and has 6 big wooden desks.

There are lots of advantages and disadvantages of our big libary .

Advantages -

  1. We can do our homework during lunch and break times, which saves us time at home.
  2. we can use the computers for our work.
  3. doing work with your freinds.
  4. help from books for work.
  5. lots of space for lots of children.

Disadvantages -

  1. we have to be quiet in the libary.
  2. uses up lots of space.
  3. in most cases children give up there whole of lunch and break, which makes it unhealthy not getting any fresh air,or getting enough time to eat.

 

As you can see , there are more advantages then disadvantages, therefor we have this lovely libary.

In my opinion as you can see i think this libary we have is brilliant and is very helpful in many ways.

Q. Why did the tomato turn red?

A. It saw the salad dressing!

Q. What did the grape do when it got stepped on?

A. It let out a little wine!

How do you make a tissue dance?

A. Put a little boogey in it!

Q. What did the judge say when the skunk walked in the court room?

A. Odor in the court.

High blood pressure

When a physician remarked on a new patient's extraordinarily ruddy complexion, he said, "High blood pressure, Doc. It comes from my family."

"Your mother's side or your father's?" I asked.

"Neither," he replied. "It's from my wife's family."

"Oh, come now," I said. "How could your wife's family give you high blood pressure?"

He sighed. "You oughta meet 'em sometime, Doc!"

The Wife

A woman accompanied her husband to the doctor's office.

After his checkup, the doctor called the wife into his office alone. He said, "Your husband is suffering from a very severe stress disorder. If you don't follow my instructions carefully, your husband will surely die.

"Each morning, fix him a healthy breakfast. Be pleasant at all times. For lunch make him a nutritious meal. For dinner prepare an especially nice meal for him.

"Don't burden him with chores. Don't discuss your problems with him; it will only make his stress worse. Do not nag him. Most importantly, make love to him regularly.

"If you can do this for the next 10 months to a year, I think your husband will regain his health completely."

On the way home, the husband asked his wife, "What did the doctor say?"

"He said you're going to die," she replied.

Advice to the Newly Married Couple

At my granddaughter's wedding, the DJ polled the guests to see who had been married longest. It turned out to be my husband and I. The DJ asked us, "What advice would you give to the newly-married couple?"

I said, "The three most important words in a marriage are, 'You're probably right.'"

Everyone then looked at my husband. He said, "She's probably right."

Library joke

What time does the library open?" the man on the phone asked. 
"Nine A.M." came the reply. "And what's the idea of calling me at home in the middle of the night to ask a question like that?"
"Not until nine A.M.?" the man asked in a disappointed voice.
"No, not till nine A.M.!" the librarian said. "Why do you want to get in before nine A.M.?"
"Who said I wanted to get in?" the man sighed sadly. "I want to get out." 
RELATONSHIP JOKES......

 

During the wedding rehearsal, the groom approached the vicar with an unusual offer.

"Look, I’ll give you £100 if you’ll change the wedding vows. When you get to me and the part where I’m to promise to ‘love, honor and obey’ and ‘forsaking all others, be faithful to her forever,’ I’d appreciate it if you’d just leave that part out." He passed the clergyman the cash and walked away satisfied.

It is now the day of the wedding, and the bride and groom have moved to that part of the ceremony where the vows are exchanged. When it comes time for the groom’s vows, the vicar looks the young man in the eye and says:

"Will you promise to prostrate yourself before her, obey her every command and wish, serve her breakfast in bed every morning of your life and swear eternally before God and your lovely wife that you will not ever even look at another woman, as long as you both shall live?"

The groom gulped and looked around, and said in a tiny voice, "Yes." The groom leaned toward the vicar and hissed, "I thought we had a deal."

The vicar put the £100 into his hand and whispered back, "She made me a much better offer."

 

 
DISCLAIMER NOTICE

This e-mail and any attachments are confidential. If you are not the intended recipient, please notify the sender immediately by replying to this e-mail, and then delete it without making copies or using it in any way.

The Trust of St Benedict's Abbey accepts no legal responsibility for the contents of the message. Any views expressed in the message are those of the sender and may not reflect the views of the Trust of St Benedict's Abbey.

Although any attachments to the message will have been checked for viruses before transmission, you are urged to carry out your own virus check before opening attachments, since the Trust of St Benedict's Abbey accepts no responsibility for loss or damage caused by software viruses

======================================================================
This email has been scanned for Virus infection by Messagelabs
=======================================================================